Subject: Jousting with Pepper Spray

Ah, the people i know...Subject lines from two emails from friends today:

Subject: Sign up for Gladiator Jousting Tournament
"anyone is welcome to sign up alone or with friends/enemies. Competitors climb onto pedestals armed with spongy batons and try to knock each other off onto a large inflated mattress" - Brandon

Subject: Pepper Spray
"I'm buying one (in preparation for NY), and I found a guy on eBay who sells them for only $5 each. And they have the leather case and everything. I'm getting one, does anyone else want one? Let me know what color you want, black, blue or red." - Angela